A positive delivery with epidural: Miles’ birth story
The Happy Parents Happy Baby antenatal course helped me prepare me for labour in ways I never imagined! There were so many things I had no idea about. The movies love to give a very false sense of what birth truly is, so if it wasn't for HPHB, I wouldn't have known what the true experience was like. All the little things you don't know you need to know until the time comes - hypnobirthing, birth plans, the decisions you and your partner are expected to make in the heat of the moment - HPHB covered all the details - from stressful to joyful and I honestly don't know what I would have done without that godsend of a checklist for the hospital!
On the afternoon of Monday, July 20th after trying literally every natural induction method under the sun because I was 5 days overdue, I discovered that my mucus plug had gone (ew!). For the rest of the day, I felt cramping, but it was minor and sporadic. We went for a few walks to try and get things going, and then before bed I really started to feel contractions. When I woke the next morning, the contractions were more intense. This is where Hypnobirthing really came in handy. With Tom’s help I worked on positive affirmations and breathing techniques to fight through the cramping. I used the yoga ball, watched literally every episode of Friends (I always find this comforting as it reminds me of home), took lavender baths where Tom would pour the water over me when a contraction would come on (so helpful!), and long showers squirting the shower head directly on my belly. I also found it really helpful to sit on the toilet directly following a contraction - after a while it was the only thing that would bring me relief.
By 12am, my contractions were coming close together, so we phoned the Labour Ward. They told me to wait as long as I could, so we waited until 2am and went in. I had an issue with a CTG scan earlier in the week where the baby’s heart rate dropped a bit, so they hooked me up instantly and then checked to find out that I was only 2cm dilated. The midwives recommend that you are at least 4cm before admiting you, so they said it would be best if I went home and came back when my contractions were closer together. At home Tom and I repeated the same routine (I could not have done it without him!), trying (but failing) to get some sleep - yoga ball, bath, shower, toilet, bed - repeat. Finally by 12am (a full 24 hours later) my contractions were closer, but never made it to the 3 in 10 mins they recommend - even when I was close to 10cm dilated my contractions never got there, so it just goes to show that when you know, YOU know and that you should trust your body, so we called anyway. They again asked me to wait 2 hours, so I called back at 2am and told was told to come in.
By the time I was seen at Triage, I was 6cm dilated. 6cm on my own, at home (yikes!). They hooked me up to the CTG again and every time I contracted, the baby’s heart would drop, so they took me to the Labour Room and I was offered gas and air. I actually wasn’t keen on this originally (I was afraid it would make me nauseous) and it definitely wasn’t in my birth plan, but at that point I was so exhausted that I was ready to try gas and air AND an epidural as soon as I was able. As we waited on the gas and air, Tom started to set up the room with our playlist and speaker, lavender oil diffuser, battery tea lights (we dimmed the lights which was really nice), a fan, frozen flannels for my head and neck and Avene face mist. I know, I know, it all sounds like a bit much, but it honestly really helped in the moment. Once the midwife came back, I was able to use my Hypnobirthing breathing techniques and the gas and air and started to offer some relief. At this point, I knew all of my energy was depleted, so we asked for the epidural. The anaesthetist was a lovely, funny man, which was welcomed at that point, but I have to admit it wasn’t the most pleasant procedure. Once the epidural was in, the contraction pain subsided a bit.
From there Tom and I were left to rest a bit (I really wish I tried harder to sleep in this moment because I could have used the extra energy to push in the end) and our midwife team swapped. Our time in the room with the second midwife was a 5 very calm hours. She just kept watching the heart monitor to ensure that the baby was okay and would check my dilation every hour or so. When I was nearing 8cm, my contractions still weren’t 3 in 10 mins, so she decided it would be a good idea to break my waters to speed up the process.
Eventually I was 10cm - it was time to start pushing! My midwife was a godsend - I am not sure I could have done it without her! The pushing process was much different to what I imagined - you kind of need to push like you’re having a poo. Once my midwife said that, it all made sense to me and I was able to go on that way for about an hour. The baby’s heart rate was going up on the monitor and so after discussion, they decided it was time for an episiotomy. From there, I pushed a few more times with everything I had left and Miles was born! He was put straight on my chest and Tom announced to me that it was a boy! We both cried for a solid 20 mins. That very moment made everything worth it. Everything. Tom was able to cut the cord and Miles was on me for about an hour. I have never felt anything like that in my life. We were instantly in love.
The first time I saw Miles it was like nothing I have ever experienced before and I honestly don't think I could have done it without a partner like Tom and our amazing midwife!
Top Tips:
ZIP UP SLEEPSUITS (No one wants to do up poppers in the middle of the night)
Women who plan to breastfeed: Don't be too hard on yourself. The very beginning is hard, you may want to give up, and then suddenly you'll be throwing your baby up your shirt, taking your boob out in public and that'll be all you know. And if you do decide to give up, that's okay too. Whatever way you decide to keep your little one alive is amazing. I hired a Lactation Consultant to come around the house and observe and she was extremely helpful! Everything changed for me from there on out.
It's okay to cry. You are embarking on one of the hardest yet most rewarding times of your life. Cry on your own, cry with your partner, cry with your baby - let it out! It helps.
Lean on your HPHB crew - The Mums (and Dads too!) from our sessions have a WhatsApp group and I honestly don't know what I'd do without them. The late night texts whilst feeding, the questions, the oversharing. They are all my saviours at the moment and I see this going on for years as our babies grow!
What works for someone else may not work for you and even if you've made endless plans and are the most Type A person on the planet, you truly can't plan for everything with your little one. It's okay to waver!
ALDI nappies are just as good as the expensive ones - save your money for all the cute clothes you'll want to buy!
