A positive second labour: Cody’s birth story
This was my second pregnancy and I felt really good throughout my whole pregnancy. I had ended up with a planned c section first time around due to her being transverse and I really felt like I’d ‘missed’ out on labour. So second time round I was determined to have a VBAC at home in water. I was very focused on this plan dismissing everything else until I did the HPHB course. Here I discovered the importance of having birth options and planning for all eventualities. Home water birth was still my number 1 focus but I then thought about all other scenarios and how I would want them to be if the need arose.
Having been met with a lot of resistance to my birth plan throughout my pregnancy (as I was classed as high risk - due to previous c section, gestational diabetes and antibodies in my blood) I had quite a negative experience with the doctors at the hospital. I felt dismissed and guilty for wanting something different to their recommendation. So having Will from HPHB a ‘real life’ Doctor talk through and explain why different things are done during birth, episiotomies for example, it was really reassuring that actually they all have your best interests at heart. It made me understand things more from a doctors perspective at a time when I just felt like they were against me.
My birth on paper was the complete opposite of what I originally wanted! However, the biggest thing I learnt with my second birth was that it’s not always what happens that is important but how it makes you feel that is important. I can honestly say my birth was a beautiful positive experience which is ultimately what I wanted.
I ended up being induced at 40+12, again after a lot of resistance as they wanted to induce at 40+6. But I felt confident after my own research that I wanted to wait as long as possible. Then after no progress after 8 hours of full on contractions I wasn’t even classed as in active labour. I felt defeated to say the least! I was active, upright, using hypnobirthing and my affirmations my breathing and just felt like I’d done everything right and had gotten nowhere. It was my decision to then opt for a c section because it was the route that made me feel most empowered at the time. I could feel my mind spiralling and I just felt tired from the constant battle with what seemed like everything with this pregnancy. Thanks to HPHB I knew exactly how I wanted my c section to be. I gave the midwife my list of preferences and everything was met. They lowered the drapes so I could see the head being born, my husband announced that it was a boy and we even got our delayed cord clamping and Dean got to cut the cord. When they announced Cody was 10lb 6.5oz I was quite relieved I’d chosen the c section route!
The moment I first saw my baby, I felt complete. I remember watching my husbands face as he announced it was a boy and saw a tear roll down his cheek. It was just so special to know that our family was complete and safe. There is no better feeling in the world then holding your new baby for the first time. My face hurt from smiling so much.
The first days at home were hard. Much harder than I anticipated. I naively thought the second time round would be a walk in the park! Been there and done that type thing but your anxieties are just the same. With our first, she got poorly on day 3 and we ended up being admitted as she’d lost 13% body weight. We were then forced into combination feeding which really made my breastfeeding journey hard. Trying to breastfeed, express, bottle feed the express and top up with formula was all consuming and I gave in at 4 months and exclusively formula fed. Which was the right decision for my mental health but I didn’t realise how much it had affected me until the HPHB course when we did the breastfeeding sessions and I ended up a blubbering mess! Jasmine, our breastfeeding specialist was amazing and so understanding, it was lovely to talk to someone that understood how I felt. So with Cody being so big and him feeding what seemed like non stop in those first few days, I ended up getting really anxious that the same thing would happen. His little lips were dry and cracked and I went into panic mode that the whole scenario with Rain was happening again. I reached out to Jasmine who again was amazing. She reassured me that as long as his nappies were still on track (which they were) then everything was fine and that my milk would be in in the next 24 hours. And she was right. Having that expert to ask was priceless. Once my mind was at ease and I relaxed again, my milk came in and we’ve had the most beautiful breastfeeding journey since. The biggest plus of lockdown for me is that it’s meant I have really been able to establish breastfeeding. I absolutely love our time feeding and it’s been such a positive experience second time round.
I regularly recommend HPHB, especially to the pregnant ladies I teach yoga to. It’s such a well rounded course, covering all aspects of birth and beyond. It was so valuable to me and I’m so thankful I did the course.
Top Tips
Knowledge is power.
Pregnancy and labour can have so many twists and turns and It’s incredibly important to be the one
actively making informed decisions to make sure you have an empowered and positive experience. Doing a course like HPHB is a great way to start!
Also if you’re breastfeeding, get a haakaa pump. It was amazing at helping me establish my milk supply.
You can read lots more Positive Birth Stories here. We have positive birth stories from all types of births, including homebirths, water births, induction of labour, instrumental deliveries and Caesarean section births.
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